This contributor's poem expresses what many experience in life as the
momentum for them to ask, "Where do I come from, where am I going, and
who and what am I?" and to express the essence of where their journey
on the spiritual path has taken them.
The search for enlightenment is often more urgent for those who are
unwanted, disabled -- physically or emotionally -- or excommunicated
from family, community, or fundamentalist faith.
I JUST KNEW…
I’m sure it was intended to be a good thing
This blessed arrival of mine.
But for reasons I couldn’t have known then
My coming was to them much less than divine.
I just knew…
I came very late into my parent’s life,
Unexpected and at an inconvenient time.
If there hadn’t been something wrong with me I believed
Acceptance and love could have been mine.
I just knew…
I was taught all about their God,
He was my Father in Heaven they said.
But he was never the God of my heart,
There had to be more to God than fear and dread.
I just knew…
So I grew up and learned to temper
My childlike joy at just being alive.
I sensed that to belong and to be accepted
I must adapt, pretend and learn to survive.
I just knew…
So I put that child of joy deep away
With a belief she was wrong and should never have been.
But that yearning for truth kept me searching
For a "yes" to my knowing within.
I just knew…
So I studied many isms and ologies.
When a teaching made sense, I made it my own.
The discoveries I made were exciting to me.
I was aware of being guided, led and shown.
I just knew…
This search of mine continued for years.
I discovered that success in life could be mine.
But the heights I had reached left me empty inside.
There had to be more to my life’s design.
I just knew…
Bit by bit and piece by piece I discovered
That the God of my Heart did exist.
This awareness became a very personal thing,
Still my quest for more Truth did persist.
I just knew…
Spirit has led me to finally discover
A philosophy of life that I could accept at last.
No judgment, only pure possibility and love,
Which allowed my past to remain in the past.
I just knew…
To my awe and amazement I was hearing
All the Truths I’d discovered on my own.
Like: Change your mind, change your world!
I can have what I wish for!… We’re all one! …I’ve come home!
I just knew…
I finally see that the Truth I’ve been seeking
Is to know there’s a Child within waiting for me,
To love and accept her as whole and complete
And allow her the freedom to fully just BE.
I just know…
This is certainly not the end of my journey,
Just a new beginning; I will never be done.
I finally know the greatest Truth in this world,
Divine Spirit, my precious child and Me…are all one!
Somewhere, I always knew…
Erin D